Declaration of War on Food Habits

I have been battling food all my life. I have realized that it is not weight I have been fighting but food. I can eat 24/7, I can eat until my belly is so full I hurt. And then I can reach for more. I eat when I am bored, I eat when I am happy, when I am sad. Doesn't matter. I don't even always like what I am eating. It is funny how that works.

Now despite all that eating I am not visually as huge as I am. I am lucky to have equal opportunity fat. Meaning my fat goes everywhere equally, instead of settling in one spot like hips and butt. So even at my largest I didn't look 100 pounds overweight. Which I was. But there is a down side too, made it easier to deny how big I was.

So I decided to get myself under control. I jiggle like a bowl of jello. My blood pressure has to be controlled by medication, and that medication has been changed 3 times in just a year. I am also facing medication for cholesterol, we will find out next week if I have brought it down enough. I am 36 years old and I am facing the heart of someone twice my age. I don't want to be old just yet.

So back in December I decided to try and get myself under control. I have managed to loose a little over 20 pounds. But I still have at least 40 more to go. I have good days and bad days. I have gotten a bit of control over my binging, I used fitday.com to enter what I was eating so I could get a picture of what I was really eating. I found out that I was eating 2-3 days worth of calories in one night. So I made it my goal to eat less than 3,000 calories a day.

I am too much of a realist to think I can stick to a 1,500 calorie diet. Even if I kept it up for a bit without cheating, highly unlikely. I knew once I went back to my own devices I would eat out of control again. There is no way I can reduce my intake like that and learn any kind of self control. it would still be a war of me against food. I decided that it was more a matter of becoming the victor in my personal battle.

So I am not on a diet. I am just eating more reasonably. I have found that if I eat regular meals, I have fewer urges late at night. My binges are smaller when I do loose it, my belly just can't hold as much.

I am also working out at least 3 days a week. I shoot for 6 days. I know I am lucky enough to have equipment at home. I won't got to a gym. Because of the muscle I have built up from lifting weights I have even managed to loose weight while on vacation. They say muscle burns more calories than fat. I think there is truth to that. I certainly did not deny myself while on vacation and I did not work out either. I lost 2 pounds. That is not a lot but it is something.

So why am I on line rambling about what I am doing? Two reasons. One I feel good about what I am accomplishing, and I want to let people know that you don't have to starve yourself to have success. I also want people to understand that exercise is even more important than diet. I think that is the one thing we always try to avoid. The second reason is I want to scream my success from the mountain top. It is really hard to share with friends my success. You know not everyone wants to talk about it. Some people either don't get it, or they don't want to hear about it. Because they are not successful.

So I have found my bootstraps and I am pulling them up. I have good days and bad days. But over all I am getting there day by day.